Tenderfoot.

Remember this picture KS? Found it buried in a long-forgotten-folder under a tub of computerscopic dust. I think that's your triple-nippled cousin in the background.

Having re-entered my house after going down to get a drink from the vending machine at a little past midnight, i locked the gate quietly. I'd woken up at about the same time with a sudden and immense craving for Mountain Dew and one eye glued shut from lying face down in bed. As i sat down in the kitchen, i could hear the distinct grunts of a horny gecko failing in it's attempt to attract a suitable mate. I slowly sipped my refreshment and the craving gradually dissapated. Without any prior warning whatsoever, i was strucky by an idea so profound that it put Einstein's E equals MC Square hypothesis to shame. Pouring what remained of my carbonated drink into Ivory's water bowl and watching her lap it up like a dog(haha?), i decided to put my idea into writing. Lying on my bed, elbows propped up and stopping blood flow to my hands, i whipped out my iPhone and activated application "Notebook". And thus i began doing something i had never even contemplated doing before, write a poem. As i racked my brains and quietly in the presence of my brother's steady breathing upstairs(bunk-bed) composed the poem that would propel me to poetic stardom, my poem slowly but surely began to take shape and meaning. As i put the finishing touches to my new past-midnight hobby, i read aloud the sentences to myself, making corrections where i saw fit. Hitting the "Done" button, my poem was saved, a series of 10 short "four-sentenced" paragraphs, forever in place. I would have full ownership of my work and would rip apart, from head to toe, anyone who dared to pry it from my grasp. As i marvelled at my work, like God did when he created the Universe as told in the bible, i couldn't help but feel a sense of gratitude to the gassy drink that woke me from my otherwise unfruitful slumber and would have resulted in me never writing the first of what would be 5 "Poems Past Midnight". To the drink that shocked my tastebuds with it's awesome sweetness and sheer force of cold that numbed my fingers. Thank you Mountain Dew and it's manufacturers. I'll remember to promote your drink once i've reached International Acclaim, heck i'll even do commercials for free as long as it involves me downing gallon after gallon of your famous drink or me swimming in a sea of dew, surrounded by mountain-sharks.

P.S : Sorry you had to read all that nonsensical wish-wash, and if you got to this point and understood everything prior to this, i applaud your notable achievement. And if you're wondering why you don't see any poem in this post, after my crazy-madman-ranting about Mountain Dew and it's inspirational properties. Fret not because i'm still pondering a suitable title for my first self-composed poem. :\